Wednesday, May 2, 2012

A big old bucket of crazy

(Part one – because there is a too much crazy out there for one blog entry)

Mental well-being, or the lack there of, is a pretty frequent topic in my life.
Insert sound effect here – cuckoo cuckoo cuckoo.

I tackle the topic with a grain of salt... and a few more, and well, a few more, until the rim of my glass is covered, and filled with a margarita.
Insert thought cloud here - mmmmmmm, margaritas 

Unfortunately, due to an incident involving extremely expired margarita mix, a couple of good friends, and nervous laughs of relief that one of us checked before pouring, I am low on margarita fixings.  So I’ll break this topic into more manageable segments.

Why are so many struggling with feelings of inadequacy these days? 
Why are we feeling guilt unless we’ve had a Rockwellian day? 
Even more bizarre, why are we blue even on the most perfect of days?

Have the pharmaceutical companies slipped something into our Scooby-snacks, in an effort to make us crave mood-stabilizing drugs?
Are aliens whispering negative words in our ears as we sleep?

Some days, the secret to consistent happiness seems as elusive as The Hubster’s treasured Sasquatch.

A topic often debated amongst friends and peers, 
and surely pays for a few mental health professional’s beach homes.
Darn, now I am blue, because I would really like a beach home.

Here's my take on the situation… it's all tied to the country’s obsession with guilt.
We are simply not allowed to do anything without somebody judging our emotions and saying
‘put on your big girl panties – you know, the ones with the ruffles – and deal with it.  There are people far worse off than you, in the world’.

Well, no shit Sherlock.
Thanks for the useless news flash.
Most of us are well aware, and understand we are better off than most.
But it does not lessen the validity of our unexplained or occasional case of the blues.

What’s upsetting you hunney bunney?
Gray hairs?  Suck it up buttercup.  Some don’t have hair.
Lack of sleep?  Get over it.  Some have chronic insomnia.
Overwhelmed with an unruly child?  Buck up buckaroo, you’re the one that chose to have one, and some cannot have kids.
Feeling sick?  Fuggettaboutit.  There are people with terminal illnesses out there.
Just blue for no reason?  At least you are not living in a cardboard box, with a family of fleas and expired margarita mix.

I'm compassionate towards those worse off, and fully acknowledge my temporary anxieties and blues may be over miniscule, and frivolous things as opposed to the true atrocities in the world…. yet still have a case of the blues.

We are no longer allowed to have occasional negative feelings.
Now, I am not talking about happiness vampires and chronic boo-hooers, looking for sympathy and sucking every last molecule of positivity out of the room like a black hole.

I'm talking about having a minor case of the blues on occasion, and wishing you could kick the feeling to the curb.
Shame shame shame.  Go feel bad about feeling bad.  While you are at it, call somebody else and make them feel guilty too.  Share the guilt and shame! 
Go medicate yourself because you have no right to feel blue.

You know what?  It’s fine to feel blue once in a while.  It happens.
It’s okay to get upset over something relatively small, and sulk for a little bit.
It is perfectly acceptable to have an occasional case of the blahs.
It's okay to laugh one minute at how silly you are being, and cry the next, because you just need to get it out.

It does not mean you are any less aware, compassionate, or rooted in reality, regarding the problems of the world.

Most of us that get the courage to express our battle with the blues, have been pro-active and made an effort to get over them.  It is not as if we are taking joy in wallowing in self-pity.

So, put on your big girl ruffle panties, grab a non-expired bottle of margarita mix, and ignore the guilt slingers.
Instead, lean on a few well padded 80's-style shoulders until the mood passes.

To sum things up, because I really need to get back to the great pajama debate – do I stay in them all day?  Or do I get dressed in less comfy clothing? - the entire thought that we need to be 100% happy, 100% of the time, is a big old bucket of crazy. 

And if you don't agree, I am designing personalized buckets in which to place your crazy, and donating them to the unfortunate souls in the world who live in denial of the validity of feeling blue once in a while. 

Please contact me with your name, address, and the amount of crazy you need to contain
(S, M, L, XL, or I have crazy oozing out of my ears, you had better custom design a barrel for me).